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"One of the guys freaked out today. I had to sweep up broken light bulbs and a smashed remote among other things. I also had to do a room search and rifle through faux porn and masrerbutory devices. My job is whack."


"Next time you 'forget' your clothes and you just got out of the showr don't dilly dally in the living room, man just get yourself to your room."

"How as today? Boring. Watched Friday the 13th 2 (wince) and.played call of duty and practiced shooting bitches. Now we are watching fast & furious 4 (better). Later I am supposed to go play with a dog and a ferret. Not sure if I actually want to do that though." Today? Boring. Watched Friday the 13th 2 (wince) and played call of duty and practiced shooting bitches. Now we are watching fast & furious 4 (better). Later I am supposed to go play with a dog and a ferret. Not sure if I actually want to do that though."."

"Why is there a moldy baggie of lunch meat in your room?"